WBNT
Blood & Thunder’s Christmas Radio is on the air.
(See sidebar.)
Track 1
Baby, It’s Cold Outside, Tom Jones and Cerys Matthews
Every time I hear this song, I renew my surprise that it’s considered holiday music. Particularly this fantastic incarnation, which could easily be retitled The Date Rapists’ National Anthem.
Track 2
Feliz Navidad, El Vez
I heard this perfomed years ago on Conan as a duet between President Clinton and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. This version, by the Mexican Elvis, is nearly as good.
Track 3
The Nutcracker Suite, Bas Kuts Breaks Mix
Before I die, I need to see the Nutcracker re-set at a rave.
Track 4
Frosty the Snowman, Fats Domino
I love the way this begins.
Track 5
Blue Christmas, Seymour Swine
This song has sentimental significance, plus I can no longer hear any version of the song without stuttering when I sing along.
Track 6
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Instrumental w/ambient sound
The music, just the music, free of context or comment, is still on my Ten Most Wanted Songs list. It would also make an excellent holiday ringtone.
Track 7
Ho Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rum, Jimmy Buffett & the Coral Reefer Band
The images this conjures, of a vacationing Santa, are unspeakably wonderful. Think jetskiing…throwing craps…walking on the beach, wearing sandals with socks, sweeping the sand with a metal detector…missing a two-footer for par and hurling his putter into the ocean….
Track 8
Dominic the Donkey, Lou Monte
The title really should be “Dominic the Christmas Earworm”. But there aren’t nearly enough Christmas songs that make you want to dance with your elbows out.
Track 9
Sleigh Ride, the Ronettes
The Talented Mr. Roto has a nice compact description of picks like this: “Just because it’s obvious doesn’t mean it isn’t true.”
Track 10
Winter Wonderland, Bootsy Collins
You can think of at least three people you need to tell, immediately, that Bootsy Collins has a Christmas album, can you not?
Track 11
Mele Kalikimaka, Bing Crosby
See Sleigh Ride.
Track 12
Santa Claus is Coming to Town, Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band
See Mele Kalikimaka.
Track 13
Jingle Bells, Richard Cheese & Lounge Against The Machine
Possibly the most inventive cover I have ever heard.
Track 14
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Lynyrd Skynyrd
I can’t quite work out which is more surprising, that Skynyrd has a Christmas album, or that it’s pretty good.
(And my thanks to the ‘Reaper for finding the player.)
December 9th, 2007 at 11:07 pm e
1. Where the hell is the volume control on that goddamn thing, and
2. with regard to track #8, my friend Yvette’s daughter turned that into the BEST mondegreen EVER: “Time to lick the donkey.” Which is how you will now sing it for the rest of your life. You’re welcome.
December 10th, 2007 at 7:28 am e
Thanks to my Mom I have a propensity for Christmas carols and for singing along. One of her favorites, Dominick the Christmas Donkey, brings a smile to my “hee-haw” singin’ along face. Thanks, Al!
December 10th, 2007 at 9:06 am e
Seek out Harry Connick Jr.’s instrumental of “Winter Wonderland” (on the “When Harry Met Sally” soundtrack) - funky brilliance. And remind me to play for you The Bobs’ cover of “Santa’s Got a Brand New Bag,” with spoken-word lead vocal by Jonathan Katz (of “Dr. Katz” fame). “Honey, put down the dreidel and listen to your father for a second … “
December 10th, 2007 at 9:42 am e
I had a friend in high school (I wonder what happened to her? Kris Bein? Where are you?) who swore that “Winter Wonderland” had the stupidest lyric ever.
“In the meadow we will build a snowman/and pretend his name is Parson Brown/he’ll say ‘are you married?’/we’ll say ‘no, man, but you can do the job while you’re in town’”
Every Christmas, she’d get massively caught up in wondering who the hell pretended to get married by a SNOWMAN. And why on earth they’d think of naming their snowman PARSON BROWN, anyway.
December 10th, 2007 at 12:18 pm e
I need more time with Bootsy’s Christmas album to fully appreciate it.
I need more time and some “assistance” with Afroman’s Christmas album to fully appreciate it.
December 10th, 2007 at 9:01 pm e
You will never again be able to hear Buffet’s Ho Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rum the same way again after I plant this in your head. Seriously, just sing along this way:
Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum, Santa’s run off to the Carribbean. No alien, psychopath, or MTV host scares me like vampires, mummies, and the Holy Ghost!
Same damn song. Once I heard it, I could not un-hear it.
December 10th, 2007 at 9:40 pm e
Kris Bein is hot.
December 12th, 2007 at 11:43 am e
I freaking love this version of “Baby It’s Cold Outside.”
Tom Jones is my personal hero.
December 18th, 2007 at 11:41 am e
Ow.
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